Dear Tennessee Thugs a.k.a. Titans,
First of all, let me offer my deepest condolences on your stinging 37-17 loss to the Jaguars yesterday. In the words of Bill Clinton, "I feel your pain". It's the same pain I felt when you treated me poorly by stomping and wiping your snotty noses on my back the last time I visited Nashville. I really felt like that was unnecessary.
It dawned on me last night when I saw how Jacksonville embarrassed you that YOU HAVE NOT WON A SINGLE REGULAR SEASON GAME since you abused me last year. I guess it's true - what goes around does indeed come around. Maybe you should consider making a public apology to myself and the Steelers. It might help your predicament. Your sorry talent level and poor coaching sure won't.
No hard feelings,
The Terrible Towel
P.S. Tell Nate Washington hello for me. We're not really missing him.
P.P.S. I've enclosed my most recent picture and even autographed it for you - "6 Time Super Bowl Champions". GO STEELERS !!